Nov. 25 2025 12:44p.
I’ve been crying for 5 hours straight since finding out Kai died on Sunday 2 days ago riding his motorcycle, he hit a pole. It happened at 3pm I last heard from him at 2pm. He actually died. I never told him how I felt about him, I never told him I loved him. He told me months ago when we did that group ride in LA that he’s falling for me. The other day I laugh/cried because of how he makes me feel. It was the first time I’ve felt that and it was because of Kai and how he treated me and cared for me. I fell for him hard last year when I went over to his place and we fell asleep with our faces right in front of each other’s, breathing in each other and our arms wrapped around one another, ever since then I was his. I wish I had been more open with him, we wouldn’t say much a lot of the time but, it was nice not having to all the time, I honestly thought he was the one, there was no negativity, it was always beautiful and accepting. I don’t know how to process this. I only have one picture of him. He would always grab my knee when he drove. Last night before I knew anything, I was freaking out because I hadn’t heard from him, I broke down crying on my way home from work and all night I cried, not even knowing what happened to him. He left my apt. Sunday morning. Now he’s gone. I can’t process it. I even called Andrew.
